Reaping what I have sowed part II

Hello friends! Sorry that I have been absent from the blogging world for so long. I really am still getting settled. Plus, I have started Sheridan in Kindergarten and that takes up a lot of time too!
But, I have to relate a funny situation that happened last weekend with Sheridan. If you have been reading my blog, you remember about 6 months ago I was at home in Corona doing yard work. I asked Sheridan to come help me clean up some clippings and her response was "Mom, do I look like Cinderella? I don't do yard work!" Yes, I was astounded and this led me to consider...........what am I sowing with Sheridan and her heart/attitude? Well, a friend/mentor of mine recommended a GREAT book called For Instruction in Righteousness by Pam Forster. I absolutely love this book! It takes all the hard work out of Christian parenting! The woman that wrote this compiled a list of "common" sins and then references many verses, consequences and thought provoking comments on each. So, as part of our daily Bible studying we have incorporated many verses/activities from this book. So, last weekend our whole family was out doing yard work (it takes many hands to do all the yard work required for the typical WA sized yard!). I had been weeding and clipping bushes and Sheridan and Jordan had been helping me for quite a while. So, finally Jordan goes off and starts to play in the yard, and since we were almost done, I said to Sheridan "it's ok honey, go and play with your sister, you can be done." Her response this time? "It's ok mom, I would rather stay here and serve you." WHAT? Is this MY child speaking? I had such a smile on my face when I heard her response! I am so grateful too that the Lord has allowed me to see the fruit of my perseverance in her spiritual life. It was such confirmation that using the Word of God to discipline has rewards! Her words show honor and respect much more than they did previously. There is progress! Hurray!!!

Lessons being learned!

Hello all!!!! Yes, I am still alive!
As most of you know, we have moved to WA!!! The past 4 weeks have been busy to say the least! We are pretty much settled in here, Michael has started his new job, the house is set up and unpacked. So far, I am enjoying living here. Some of you know that I previously lived for 13 months in Indiana while Michael was completing his internship for his doctoral program. Well, I am happy to report, WA is nothing like IN!!!! I love our neighborhood, love our house (for the most part, although it is a bit small for us!), Michael seems to like his job so far, and we found a great church! A lot has been happening.
So, despite all of this I think I am still a bit sad. I really miss my "old life." I miss my house, miss my neighborhood, miss my church, miss my family and I really miss all my friends. And, I miss the sense of contentment that I had at "home." I kind of feel like "ok, what am I supposed to do with myself NOW?" My response to this is..............wait on the Lord. But, I am so BAD at waiting! I know that the Lord has brought us here for a reason, and He is in control. For some reason, God chose to move us out of our comfort zone and into an unfamiliar zone! For me, accepting this and not clinging to the past, is crucial. Otherwise, I feel angry at my husband, bored, lonely and sad. After all, I MYSELF prayed that God would remove anything that was keeping me from a closer relationship with Him, so I am convinced that my level of contentment was keeping me from being closer to Him.
Would I trade my contentment for a closer relationship with God? Yes. Would I trade the familiar for the unfamiliar for a closer relationship with God? Yes. Would I trade a busy life for a slower pace for a closer relationship with God? Yes.
So, my task is clear. Pursue God during this waiting time. Find Him. Rely on Him. Praise Him.

Sensored and disciplined

It's been a rough few weeks spiritually speaking for me! Out of the blue, the Lord decided to teach me a few lessons, painful lessons. It all started one Sunday night at church when Michael and I attended a talk from our pastor about discipline. I won't bore you with all the details, but let's just say that the Lord used this night to very publicly teach me about submission to my husband. If that wasn't painful enough, He finished me up with a sermon on Sunday on Revelation 3: 15-16. Our pastor spoke on the words of Christ to the church in Laodicea: "I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot; I wish that you were cold or hot. So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth." The pastor went on to talk about "lukewarm" Christians, saying that they had a "2nd class dedication to a 1rst class cause." A lukewarm Christian, he said, is a mix of the world and the church, they want salvation without discipleship! Salvation without discipleship. Wow, that sounded like me! I have struggled intensely the past few years with balancing time to read the word and pray, with "down time" and "me time." Often times I have rationalized my lack of discipline in the word by saying "I'm a mom, I am just so busy" or "I work all day every day, I deserve down time." What I really wanted was salvation without discipleship. I wanted to be saved, but not put in the time. Our pastor went on to say that a lukewarm Christian is ineffective for Christ and has no chance of being used in the world for Christ because they never catch the attention of the world! Well, if I am "lukewarm", how am I going to reach my children for Christ, let alone the world???? These experiences have brought about a new committment in me for the things of Christ. I am determined NOT to be a lukewarm Christian. On June 29th I began a quest to read through the entire Bible, something I have never done before. I have consistently read my Bible and prayed at night since that day. I praise the Lord for this! I don't want to be comfortable and complacent in my committment to Christ. I want to need the Lord. In return, maybe He can use me in some small way!
Are you cold, lukewarm, or hot for Christ???

A lesson on love

I have to write about a recent incident in the life of Sheridan, my 5 year old. Last week after church, she told me that there was a girl in her class that day with a "strange hand." She proceeded to point the little girl out to me and sure enough, one of her hands looked as if it had a birth defect. I cringed as Sheridan related to me that she had asked the little girl "what's that?" and "does that hurt?" This began a long conversation (it actually lasted throughout the week!) on why this little girls hand was different, why God made her that way, how Sheridan felt about it, and other various topics related to this.
I realized quickly, that this was the first time Sheridan had seen someone with a disability, other than someone in a wheel chair. Both Michael and I spent a lot of time processing this with Sheridan, and we focused specifically on the fact that Jesus doesn't make mistakes, that He had made her that way on purpose, and that Jesus looks at what people are like on the inside, not the outside, and so should we. Sheridan admitted that she had felt "scared" when she first saw the little girls hand, and we normalized that. One other thing we talked about was the fact that despite having a hand that looked different, the little girl was likely fun, kind, smart and would make a great friend. We even gave Sheridan suggestions on what she could say the next time she saw the little girl, such as "do you want to be my friend?"
So, yesterday when I picked Sheridan up from her class, she was playing with this particular little girl. As Sheridan came toward the door, the little girl followed and I got to meet her. It was clear that they had become friends! The conversation that I had with Sheridan later brought tears to my eyes and thankfulness to my heart!! She told me that when she saw the little girl, she said to her "do you want to be friends?" Sheridan reported that the little girl got a huge smile on her face and said "yes!" Sheridan also told me how much fun they had had at church, and all the things they had done together that day. She ended by saying to me "mom, you were right! Even someone with a different hand can be a great friend!"
I was so grateful to the Lord for providing this wonderful opportunity for Sheridan to learn about how God loves us, how we can love others, and the value of other people, even those that look "different"!!

Not just an Ark!

Have you read Genesis 9 lately? If you are a parent, you need to consider it! I was reading it recently and came to the end of the chapter, to a part that has always been a little bit of a mystery to me. Let me give you a recap...........Noah has begun farming, grows a vineyard, gets drunk and lays naked in his tent. His son Ham came in and saw him, went out, told his 2 brothers who then took a blanket, walked in to the tent backwards, and covered Noah. So what, right? Did you know that because of what Ham did, his son Canaan was cursed and that all of his descendants have become extinct? Seriously, what did he do?? My study Bible says that Ham dishonored his father and sinned. This is where the "mystery" comes in, this just never made sense to me!! So, I consulted my handy dandy Encyclopedia of Bible Difficulties and this is what it said...."Ham derided and dishonored his father after he found him naked, sleeping off a drunken stupor. Ham should have treated his father respectfully even though he had made a fool of himself."
Flash forward to present day.....if God feels that just LOOKING at your father in that situation is dishonoring him, what can he think of our children now???? Our children who talk back, disobey, sin daily against us!
Another part to this is found in Deuteronomy 21 where it says that if any man has a "stubborn and rebellious" son, who "will not obey his father or his mother" he should be brought out to the elders of the city and (are you ready for this??) STONED TO DEATH. Yes, you read that right! Can you imagine that being a law today? I doubt if my children would have made it to their 2nd birthdays!!
So, what does all this mean? Here's what it means........God takes children's obedience and respect for parents very seriously! After reading these passages, it really motivated me to commit myself even more to the discipleship of my children, not just to make my life easy, but so that my children can be pleasing to the Lord!

An investment in the future

Have you noticed how much WORK it is to raise kids? I don't mean cooking, cleaning and doing laundry either! That is hard work, but it is mindless hard work! The hard work I am referring to is DISCIPLESHIP!! That is what is so time consuming and tiring.
I have been working with Sheridan lately on the way she speaks to me. Sometimes she speaks with less than the respect she is supposed to! So, I have undertaken this and my goal is to increase her respectful attitude and speech. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WORK THIS TAKES? I can honestly say that I understand how some parents just give up and say "oh well, hopefully it will work out someday!" Because this type of teaching, this type of discipling takes hard work. Redirecting her speech takes time and effort. I have to stop what I am doing, go over to her, crouch down and help her to rephrase what she has just said. On top of that is the discipline that takes place if she refuses, and the heart work that needs to take place between her and the Lord to complete this process. I am constantly using scripture with her and helping her to say things differently. I am constantly paying attention to her attitude and ability to submit. I am constantly praising her when she does a great job.........and the list goes on.
And guess what? It is starting to pay off. When asked to clean up the playroom the other day you know what she said? "Sure mom!", and she got right to it! She is learning to submit, obey and with the right heart attitude!!!! Is she perfect at this yet? NOT! Am I always consistent? NOT! But, with the Lord's help we will persevere, believing that ALL things are possible through the Lord, and that he has a plan for my daughter and I need to be faithful to prepare her for it!

Reaping what I have sowed!

So, today I brought the girls outside to play and I decided to do some yard work. I ended up trimming a ton of bushes and doing some weeding. At the end of all of this I had a large pile of weeds that needed to be picked up. So, I said to the girls "I want you guys to come over here and help me pick these up." Jordan came right over and started picking up, but Sheridan on the other hand didn't. She looked at me and said the following: "Mom! Do I look like Cinderella? I don't do yard work!" Once I picked my jaw back up, I was not happy! I won't bore you with the details of what happened next but I will say this............I am reaping what I have sowed. Why? Some of you know that I consider one of my biggest mistakes as a parent to be the fact that I cleaned up virtually every mess Sheridan ever made for the first 3 years of her life! And you know what? I still do!! Why? Because honestly I can do it better and faster and since I am such a neat freak, this is appealing to me! I honestly do not mind doing it. But, now I am realizing the folly of my ways and today I realized that I truly am reaping what I have sowed. While this may be a minor thing in the grand scheme of things (or not, time will tell) it made me wonder what else I am sowing that I may not want to reap in the future. Tonight I prayed with extra fervency that the Lord would give me wisdom and discernment in the raising of my children. I want to raise them up in the way they should go, so that when they are old, they shall not depart from it.